User blog:Gary the Gaget Dude/Tales of Gary's Marvel Cinematic Universe - Episode Two: War of the Teams

Enjoy!

It was a normal day at the S.H.I.E.L.D. Helicarrier...

IRON MAN: Yeah, then I put Mandarin in jail.

SPIDER-MAN: Woah! Cool!

CAPTAIN AMERICA: -snorts- Not as cool as what I did to Red Skull.

HULK: OOOOH! Hulk smell challenge!

FALCON: So, Cap, what was so AMAZING you did to Red Skull?

CAPTAIN AMERICA: I pushed him out of the plane and he fell to his death.

HAWKEYE: DUDE. That's cold!

THOR: He survived, by the way.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: I'm sorry?

THOR: Yeah. He landed in the Alps and found the Tesseract, then it teleported him to Odin's Throne Room.

IRON MAN: Hah!

NICK FURY: GUYS GUYS WE GOTTA EMERGENCY!

CAPTAIN AMERICA: We gotta emergency? I think you mean "We've got an emergency,"

SPIDER-MAN: Grammar nazi.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: Hey, I'm not a Nazi.

NICK FURY: The X-Men and the Fantastic Four wish to see you at Palm Beach in Florida.

BLACK WIDOW: What? But it's so far away...

NICK FURY: I don't care! AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!

Meanwhile, at Palm Beach in Florida...

WOLVERINE: The X-Men are awesome!

BEAST: Yeah! We rule!

HUMAN TORCH: No way, man! Fantastic Four are better!

THE THING: You bet we are!

CYCLOPS: Every girlfriend I have dies.

The Avengers arrive...

THOR: What seems to be the problem, fellow superhero teams?

WOLVERINE: We'd like to challenge you to a battle of the ages.

IRON MAN: Really? What for?

MR. FANTASTIC: To find out which superhero team is the best in this universe!

HUMAN TORCH: No contest, it's the Fantastic Four.

PROFESSOR X: Incorrect! The X-Men are superior to you!

IRON MAN: Uh, the Avengers PWN you all.

FALCON: What he said.

BEAST: Yeah? Well, let's all fight for it!

PROFESSOR X: Indeed. The X-Men VS The Fantastic Four VS The Avengers. Let the battle commence!

Everyone splits up in their own ways to their "base"

WAR MACHINE: So me and Falcon will guard the base camp boundary?

CAPTAIN AMERICA: Yup! Good luck! -runs out of the base camp with Iron Man, Hulk, Thor and Black Widow-

Meanwhile, at the X-Men base...

WOLVERINE: Ready to go into battle?

BEAST: You bet! Nightcrawler, you coming?

NIGHTCRAWLER: -shakes head yes-

CYCLOPS: Well, let's get moving. Professor X is gonna be our Oracle, right?

WOLVERINE AND BEAST: Our what?

CYCLOPS: Oracle! He communicates with us through communicating devices or something.

BEAST: Sure, why not?

''Wolverine, Nightcrawler, Beast and Cyclops leave the base. And meanwhile, at the Fantastic Four base...''

MR. FANTASTIC: Alright, are we ready to go?

INVISIBLE WOMAN: Yup! Silver Surfer, you guard the base.

SILVER SURFER: Yeah, okay.

All the teams meet up in the center of the beach and start battling

NICK FURY: STOP! Everyone knows that S.H.I.E.L.D. is better than all of you guys put together!

IRON MAN: What? No way!

THING: You guys are stupid.

CYCLOPS: Guys, wanna team up and defeat S.H.I.E.L.D.?

BEAST: What would our team name be?

SPIDER-MAN: How about The Spider-Men?

BLACK WIDOW: No, you idiot! There are girls here.

BEAST: How about X-Men Unlimited?

CAPTAIN AMERICA: Some of us aren't mutants.

IRON MAN: I got it! The Ultra-Avengers!

EVERYONE EXCEPT S.H.I.E.L.D.: Yeah!

NICK FURY: Okay, guys, BRING IN THE S.H.I.E.L.D. AGENTS!

''Phil Coulson, Maria Hill, Sharon Carter, Jasper Sitwell, Luke Cage and the guys from the TV show "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D." show up''

PHIL COULSON: Attack!

IRON MAN: Tank missile! -shoots them and the S.H.I.E.L.D. base blows up-

BEAST: We did it!

WOLVERINE: Party at my beach house?

ULTRA-AVENGERS: YEAH!

Meanwhile, at the beach party...

HUMAN TORCH, IRON MAN, WOLVERINE, AND SPIDER-MAN: -doing the Harlem Shake at the party-

THE END!